tell me a story, tell me what you think about me, something that is on your mind, something you regret, anything.

but comment anonymously.

so, i've had this journal for... three years? yeah, three years. ever since i was sixteen years old. now that i look at it, all i want to do is just desert it and start over because, while it's caught so many interesting moments of my life, it just feels alienated to me (then again, i'm pretty alienated myself- so that might be a part of it), discombobulated, out of place.

('i'm never going to keep my journal after high school,' i told her.
'why not?' she asked. 'you're not going to document your life in college? i'm definitely keeping mine when i do.'
'i don't know,' i shrugged. 'it just doesn't feel right to me.'

she stopped writing in her years ago.)

i'm going to start anew. this is my fourth journal (the first one to go through a rename, as well!) and i feel like leaving this journal at this point of time and age would be better off than trying to continue on. thus, giving you, my flist, the option if you'd like to follow me or not.

elegantdresses is where i'm moving on to, and hopefully it'll be as interesting as this journal once was.

see you on the other side.

i am in desperate need of a shopping trip, but trying to hold back so i can visit sarshin and hopefully bingomassacre, so i thought window shopping would at least ease the pain a little.

( STUFF I WANT )

i'm not very coherent now and all i really want to do is just curl up in bed and cry and reminisce over the last six years of my life, but the ending was perfect- and whoever is/was skeptical about the show is missing out on the overall beauty; it was never about the numbers or the polar bears or any of that- it was about these characters and their developments and how they loved and lost and if that doesn't convince you to like a show, then maybe you shouldn't be watching television in the first place.

lost has been through many tough times of my life, through middle school when my mother died, high school when i nearly failed, and my first year of college when i was convinced i wasn't going to make it anywhere. the ending was beautiful and i would not rather have it any other way. so thank you lost for making the biggest impact on my life and thank you to those who put up with my obsession and who obsessed with me, because it wouldn't have been an amazing experience without you.

if there was a show that ever gave me any hope of my future being worthwhile and that in this huge, vast universe i matter for a reason, this would be the one to convince me.

thank you lost. ♥

today chad, aaron, devon, and i decided to do a photoshoot, and ended up finding this lovely place. it's twenty stories high and overlooks the ronald reagan harbor, and perfect for a party. ♥ we had to sneak it, but it's actually fairly easy to get in anyway. i am sure nobody would mind if we ended up having an awesome cocktail party (which will hopefully be SOON).

saturday was UTTERLY AMAZING. i went to raygunronica's birthday party (which was also a gqmf_dc meetup) and had an amazing time. i drank so much sangria that all i wanted to do was eat pizza and talk; i met some amazing people (sup felonaz) and drank even more wine! raygunronica & eric were total sweethearts and let me spend the night at their apartment (THANK YOU GUYS, AGAIN. i seriously cannot express my gratefulness enough- and thanks for letting me come to the party, spending the night, and putting up with me going ON AND ON about nothing. ♥)

also, they have the most adorable cats ever.

this is iggy, i tried to get pictures of my BFF rufus (who jumped on me at 6 in the morning and was like HI- love at first site!) but he refused to stay still. iggy is still a cutie though!
two more @ flickr.

finally glad to have a break where all i can do is drink wine, go outside, analyze the hell out of watchmen, and meet new people. i'm fairly sure i can stay in student housing until may/june, so i have a few more month of living in DC. :)

i am a AiW student no more! my dad came back from his trip today and asked if i still wanted to go to that school- and despite loving where i live right now and having some amazing friends- i said yes, because if i'm not happy with my work and/or unhappy most of the time, i shouldn't be at this school.

i'm going home for a couple of months (hopefully until the end of august, which is when the fall semester of VCU starts), but i'm gonna find a way to come see everyone in DC. :') (also, sarshin, if you're still coming down, i can ask jessica if there's any way both of us can stay at the apartment since they're not going to replace the roommates for next quarter. IF THAT'S COOL WITH YOU?)

here's hoping i don't go even crazier while i'm at home. i'm going to just try and get some shoots in and find ways to come down here frequently so i won't be in the middle of nowhere for so long.